A walk to remember

It was one of the normal evenings. Life in suburbs is always phlegmatic, easy going and placid. Bovine creatures and bovine humans lived in that sparsely populated area. I was walking down the street, on one of my normal walks. There is no better way to get rid of the morbid day-dreaming which i do in front of an open book at home, then to just say that u need fresh air and walk out. People think of these walks as a easy method to stay healthy and live a long gay life. I used to think of them as the only recluse to which i have an access during my stay at home, when i can go and get my usual dose of one cigg. a walk. Two cigg.'s a day, keeps a doctor away. So, there i was walking randomly, humming my favorite tone, following the criss-cross of roads, one turn here, one turn there, just to avoid surveillance, if there was any. I trust my pre-conceived notions of counter-surveillance which have been formed by watching innumerable pacino-de niro-spacey flicks. Whenever i turn, i turn suddenly throwing a quick glance at the street through which i had just been walking. Follow a new pattern of roads everyday, bye fags from different shops and take proper precautions afterwards(pepsi+ samosa+ chutki) to make sure that your parents believe that you are still their little kid. So much for security.

As i kept walking, i saw my favorite shop from a distance, some kids standing there for candy, other grownups enjoying puffs or tobacco, discussing everything from politics to polio. The kids were quite happy, as they usually are during a festive season. It seemed as if they came from the house next to the shop because they were constantly looking in that direction as if checking that no-one comes out of the home and catches them buying candy. I got there and asked the shopkeeper, who as always had this "I know your parents don know this and dont like this" look on his face, for a cigg. The kids were looking at me.I noticed the dancing emotions at the kids face by throwing a slight glance. First the expression was normal, as if ignoring, then it changed to a mixture of interest and "mommy says its bad" as i asked for the cigg. , finally ignoring everything and coming back to his own demand of candy. The shopkeeper took an obvious delight in completing my request before that of the kids, probably because of my seniority, or maybe because i was an old customer(who always bought a pepsi there, which is obviously of greater benefit to him than the 4 cent candy).Meanwhile the kids kept on urging for their stuff. There was a little noise coming from the house next door, the house to which the kids probably belonged, as if some religious proceedings were going on there. Suddenly among all these happenings, there were some footsteps from the house as if someone was coming to the main gate. One of the kids ran towards the door, looked from some distance and shouted to his partner to hurry up as his elder sister was coming out. The kid started pleading in front of the shopkeeper to give him the candy first. The shopkeeper, though was unperturbed and was slowly taking out one cigg. from a pack of wills. The footsteps were becoming louder, the unseen danger was coming closer, the kids kept on urging for their candy, one was almost on the verge of crying in front of the complacent shopkeeper to quickly give him what he wanted so that he wasn’t caught in the act. It was at this point that something struck me. For one moment, the whole world started revolving around me. I was on a stage in the centre of a stadium with all the flood-lights focused on me and everything just kept on rotating. The sound of the footsteps was becoming louder and louder, my heart was racing faster and faster, for one moment i was looking at the kid's face and then on the door behind which lurked the impending danger. The danger, about which i always knew, it wasn't as if i was gonna die, it was as if i was losing me. The sound kept on increasing, the kids kept on crying, the shopkeeper placed the cigg in front of me, but where was i. I cant recall it now. I took the cigg. with trembling hands and with a heart that was trying to burst out, placed it between my lips, and asked for matches. My ears were burning with the mixed cries coming from both the sides, the sounds of the impending catastrophe and the muffled cries of a dying hound pleading for life.I asked for the matches again. The shopkeeper finally handed the candy to the kids and just at that moment, the kid's sister came out. The kid hastily put the candy in his pocket and walked towards his sister who was unable to see the candy, and quite amiably they went inside. I had become totally numb by then. From buying candy that way to buying cigg.'s this way, i had come a long way. But still the fear remained the same. The adventure, the adrenaline flow hasn’t diminished even one bit and again it comes at its own price. I asked for the matches again.

By that time the shopkeeper was looking curiously at me and then i realized that i had asked for the matches three times when it was lying there just in front of me. I somehow lighted the cigg. and walked away. The entire event and the nicotinous smoke in my lungs after a gap of one full day made me walk in an unsteady manner. I wasn’t able to hear any sound, or feel the road, as i walked till the end of the road, as the entire events kept on banging on my mind board. The ground was wet, or so i thought, because i couldn’t hear my slippers striking the gravel. I took 2 or 3 puffs and then eventually realized that the ground wasn’t wet, it hadn’t rained for the past month and the road was thoroughly dry. Seems like it rained for me only. I walked on and on until i reached my pet sweet shop where i bought a pepsi. The chilling liquid and the smoke steadied me down. It was only then that i realized that i had walked almost 3 kms in that state of lucid dream. I cudnt hear anything, just kept looking at the ground, it was a desert, with vast mounds of sand around me, with nobody to be seen. Crippled by the vastness, i somehow managed to walk and reach my destination.

I finally got home, drank some water and sat once again in front of the open book. A smile slowly curled on my lips when i recalled the incident, the thief inside me so close to being caught red handed.